Problem Child

[likeits1999]

...So, uh. Got some things I should probably tell you guys.

[ Kevin seems a little nervous, he has trouble doing "eye contact" with the mirror. ]

I guess like... first of all, I'm Kevin? I'm from New York? I skate? I've met some of you but not everybody so...

[ He shrugs. ]

You ever known somebody who... uh, has a personal problem? But it turns out that if you know 'em and are around 'em all the time it kinda winds up to be their crap ends up being everybody's shit to deal with?

It's kinda like that.

[ Everything about trying to explain this is awful. Everything. ]

The thing with me is... well..

I'm... kind of a vampire?

[ There. He said it. Getting that part out helps him square up and face it a little better, his gaze steadies straight on the mirror. ]

Actually, not "kind of" at all. I'm definitely a vampire. I drink people's blood. I have to. Been doing this shit a good while, too. The Green's got my back with the whole sunlight deal, but I still ain't exactly keeping down regular grindage if you know what I'm saying.

[ Kevin winces a little. He tried. ]

So... here's the deal: I need to drink blood sometimes. Otherwise I get hungry, and when I get hungry I stop... being able to be a person so good? It's bad. Trust me.

[ Please, please trust the self-described vampire. ]

It's not a lot all the time, I can go a bit if I'm full up, and I can stretch it on animals and junk like that, but it's... yeah, dog.

[ He makes his lungs pull in air and breathe it back out in a long hwoo. ]

The other thing is it's probably... if I'm gonna be real with allay'all, I don't want to put my teeth in you? I mean, I got 'em.

[ He takes a second to drop fangs and show the mirror before pulling them back in, which probably does a whole lot of good for his image with the team. ]

It does stuff to people, though? And I don't want to be like that if we're gonna be doing this Lord of the Rings shit together, alright? If we're gonna be real, I'm gonna be real.

[ Kevin's shoulders sink a little as this sudden surge of confidence falters. ]

I don't know what I'm supposed to do about this, but I'm not lying about it and I'm not gonna sneak around. And I mean.... if y'all wanna run me off into the woods, cool, but I'm gonna end up stuck comin' back like any of the rest of us.

If I could just go find someplace else to be, I mean...

[ He smiles weakly. ]

You wouldn't be hearing this.

Comments

[wherenoonegoes]

Dixon? He's just mouthing off right now. Don't sink to his level.

[awfulcer]

I asked a question and he got up in my face and I have the right to defend myself when he does that! Don't tell me what to do, Hiccup, you're not my chief.

[Dixon's not just sinking to Harper's level, he's trying to drag everyone else down with him, and he's sinking into that whirlpool of negativity as rage and insecurity and grief and anxiety all suck him down past where he can think straight.]

[wherenoonegoes]

Fine. You're right. I'm not your chief, I can't tell you what do.

So I'm just going to ask what your chief would think about this. If you want to keep doing this after you come up with an answer, be my guest.

[Because if that's not going to get Dixon to stop, nothing is.]

[awfulcer]

You don't know the first thing. Don't you start talking about what my chief would have thought. [But Dixon knows, and it hits home, and that's why he can't help but have his eyes well up even while he shouts.]

[wherenoonegoes]

You're absolutely right. You're the only one here who knows what he'd think. You could tell me anything, even that he'd be proud of you for doing this, and I'd believe it. It wouldn't be out of the question, I know plenty of chiefs who would be.

[The only question is if Dixon would really want Hiccup to think that.]

[awfulcer]

I don't have to talk to you about this. [Hiccup's got him dead to rights, and Dixon feels himself collapsing in under the weight of how out-of-control he feels, a wave of shame for what's happened in the last five minutes, for what his chief would have thought. For how wrong his Chief was about everything from Dixon's luck to the very fabric of his character. He's shaken and he's not great at hiding that.] I don't have to talk to you about anything.

[wherenoonegoes]

No, you don't. But you're still here, which means you want to talk to somebody. Or at least yell at them. Otherwise you would've backed out of this already.

[awfulcer]

[Hiccup has a point there. For a moment Dixon’s stuck waffling between the pride that would get him to end the conversation and the desperate need for companionship. The view in the mirror jostles a little because he’s shaking.]

I just need someone to come punch this shield already, that’s what I want.

[wherenoonegoes]

Yeah, I feel like that's exactly what you don't need right now, especially with the injury.

Would you like me and Toothless to come sit with you outside for a bit? I promise I'll keep my mouth shut unless you want to talk, and Toothless won't kick you. I need to get some drawing in before we leave anyways.

[awfulcer]

I could need it because of the injury, ever thought of that? [The pain of the injury is a much secondary concern to all the emotional chaos happening right now, but the shield’s magic does have anaesthetic properties. Agitation isn’t the only thing it helps with.

He considers the offer for a second, anger seeping away and leaving him bottomed out with all the other ugly emotions.]

Depends. Drawing what?

[wherenoonegoes]

The city, mostly. You, if you decide you're okay with it. I kind of want to have some record of all this when we get home, even if nobody believes me. Especially if nobody believes me, just to have something to remind me it happened.

[When, not if. He's not going to let himself believe there's no way back. The Green brought them here, the Green can return them.]

Has anyone tried the athelas on it yet? Those kind of wounds are what it's for.

/wrap

[awfulcer]

[Back when he was a kid - before alcohol became a proxy - sitting and drawing for hours was a way to calm down from his intense and terrifying tantrums and meltdowns. There's something appealing about returning to that now. He takes a deep breath through his nose and jams his hands into his pockets.]

Alright. If you got some, I'll be right over.